Last week I had the blessing of experiencing another birthday. To celebrate, I’d like to give the gift of information to some of our faithful Social Incites™ readers! In honor of Autism Awareness Month, we’ll be giving away seven books about autism or Asperger Syndrome. If you’d like to be entered in our drawing to win one of these resources, just email me, “I’d like to win a free book!” (If there’s one in particular that interests you, feel free to indicate that when you email). We’ll select seven winners this week; one for each resource. Winners will be contacted via email and announced on our Facebook page. (If you don’t win, you can purchase any of these resources on Amazon by clicking on the titles).

Here are the resources we’re giving away:

-       22 Things a Woman with Asperger’s Syndrome Wants Her Partner to Know by Rudy Simone

-       A Friend’s and Relative’s Guide to Supporting the Family with Autism: How Can I Help? By Ann Palmer

-       Letters to the Home Front: Positive Thoughts and Ideas for Parents Bringing up Children with Developmental Disabilities, Particularly those with an Autism Spectrum Disorder by John Clements

-       Out to Get Jack by James Williams

-       The Thursday Surprise: A Story about Kids and Autism by Ryan R. Ennis

-       Hand-in-Hand by Laurel Falvo

-       ASD to Z: Basic Information, Support, and Hope for People Living with Autism Spectrum Disorders, by Laurel Falvo

-       (You can also email us, “I’d like to win a free consult!” for a chance to win a free phone or Skype consult!)

Be sure to have your friends and family connect with us if they’d also like a chance to win. We look forward to getting the information contained in these great resources to people who can put it to good use helping themselves or others to grow personally and interpersonally!

Last week I encouraged you to get to know someone with an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Part of “social insight” is viewing life from the perspectives of people with ASD. The following poem was written by our friend Sondra Williams, from Columbus, Ohio. (Please keep reading for an opportunity to support Sondra’s dream!)

They Say

© 2005 Sondra Williams

I heard them talking about me, saying I am not like others
I can dance and sing and play, I feel, and cry tears too.
I am more like you, than you think

I heard them say that my silence reflects no emotion, no connections.
I cry many unseen tears, I laugh at life's blunders, although not in ways foreseen.
I connect like you, more than you think.

They say I am intellectually impaired and will never learn to reach my potential
I know about words and explore the world in ways others rarely know.
I am smarter, than you think.

The doctor says I will not be able to show affection or relate to my own family
I gave them a smile from across the room, they didn't even notice.
I do know and feel love, more than you may think.

Some say my anger and the rages are animalistic.
I tried to communicate my fear the only way I know how, but no one was listening.
I get angry like you, for reasons like you, more than you think

The doctors say there is no hope I am void of understanding
I have dreams and think on them often, but due to my silence I can't share them.
Yes, I have dreams and goals, just like others, more than you think

Strangers say I am out of control and not human.
I have a body, mind and soul, just somewhat challenged.
I am human more than you think.

I heard them talking, saying oh, she has autism, a disability of no hope
If they only knew what is trapped inside me, I think.
They would say she's more like me, than what I used to think.
_____________________________________________________

What a beautiful example of “social incites”—beautiful perspectives that hopefully incite us to respond to others with more empathy, respect, and hope!

April is Autism Awareness Month. It’s a great opportunity to learn more about the diagnosis and to find ways to demonstrate compassion for those affected by autism.

There are countless other days and/or months set aside to raise awareness of various diagnoses, environmental concerns, historical figures and events, significant relationships, etc. Whether or not you are touched personally by whatever is being remembered, mourned, celebrated, or taught, these can prompt us to deliberately consider other people’s abilities, achievements, perspectives, needs, opinions, dreams, fears, and struggles.

These are all opportunities for raising social awareness; awareness of the fact that we all have a unique “context,” or starting point in life, comprised of our past experiences and how we feel about them, our personality, our age, functioning level, emotions, and all of the things mentioned in the above paragraph.

Do you know someone with autism? The statistics (1 in 68) indicate that you probably do. I hope you’ll use Autism Awareness Month to be deliberate about getting to know that person better, not as a diagnosis, but as a unique and valuable person. I guarantee that your life will be enriched as a result!

Is autism an “epidemic”? Are children “stolen” from their parents through the onset of autism? Are families’ lives “shattered” by the presence of a loved one with this diagnosis?

I’ve heard or read all of the above emotion-laden comments (and many more) over the years. Since April is Autism Awareness Month, in the next several weeks we’ll likely witness a variety of events, news stories, research updates, and reminders of the realities facing families and individuals affected by this diagnosis. The value of increased awareness goes far beyond the one in 88 people who carry the diagnosis. (New research says it’s now one in 68!) But I hope that we won’t overlook this important truth: that the many children, adolescents, and adults diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders have contributed greatly to the value of individual lives, had tremendous impact on their families, and profound influence on their teachers, classmates, workplaces, and communities.

As we focus again on autism awareness, I wanted to share some of what I have learned from and come to appreciate about people with autism:

1.     They have a unique perspective on life. They see things I miss, they question things I take for granted, and they challenge me to consider different ways of understanding life and those around me. My life is richer because of them.

2.     They have a more unbiased approach to people and situations. I carry with me my own expectations, memories, and opinions, which cloud or direct the way I approach life. Their tendency to approach people and situations with a “clean slate,” taking them at face value, is something that continues to have a positive influence on me.

3.     They contribute to my knowledge base. Because of people with autism, I know more about trains, elevators, animals, dinosaurs, chickens, music, plants, sports statistics, computers, and Pokemon(TM) than I ever would have otherwise. They have “broadened my horizons”—and our society has also benefited greatly from their interests and contributions!

4.     They require me to keep thinking and learning. I have been interacting with people with autism spectrum disorders for about fifteen years. I find that the more I know, the more I need to know. The need for flexibility, new approaches, novel ways to help them understand, and a better grasp on how they view the world drives me toward asking them more questions, reading more books, listening to more professionals in the field, talking to other parents, and trying new strategies. I recognize the tremendous value of this pursuit of understanding for both my personal and professional life.

5.     They make great friends! I have numerous friends who are people with ASD. They are loyal, dependable, slow to judge or jump to conclusions, funny, and very knowledgeable. Because of them, I have also made wonderful friends who are teachers, parents, grandparents, and others working to promote social understanding all around the world.

I consider it a privilege to know and learn from so many fine people. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to interact with you each week! Please feel free to email or post comments on our blog.

Thank you for the work you are doing to raise autism awareness, but more importantly, appreciation for the people who are living with autism, and all those who work on their behalf!